Nature photography, political rants, and Martyman laughs from the ten-time award-winning author of "Cool Creatures, Hot Planet," "Endangered Edens," and "Time Is Irreverent."

Posts tagged Trump

A secret message from the Republican Jesus

A secret message from the Republican Jesus

“Psst . . . Hey, ammosexuals and fetish patriots . . . Republican Jesus here. Sorry to have to hide in your refrigerator like this, but I have a super-secret message for you that has to remain just between you and me. I know you have two major fantasies: “Your first fantasy is that you […]

The longest migration on Earth

The longest migration on Earth

Marty’s photo of the day #2594: This is a tiny segment of the Porcupine caribou migration. These caribou migrate between Canada and the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge in Alaska. Their 800 mile-long migration is the longest of any land animal on Earth. Now that the Republican cult and Rut Leader Trump have opened up the […]

Scared of Eagles and Lynx? Have a military parade!

Scared of Eagles and Lynx? Have a military parade!

Much is being made in the news about President Crybaby Chickenshit uninviting the Super Bowl Champion Philadelphia Eagles from their White House visit. What deserves just as much attention is that President Crybaby Chickenshit was too cowardly to even initiate a visit from the WNBA Champion Minnesota Lynx. Yes, President Crybaby Chickenshit was too scared […]

Puerto Rico electric vs paper towels

Puerto Rico electric vs paper towels

Marty’s photo of the day #2518: In honor of the Minnesota Twins vs. Cleveland Indians baseball games in Puerto Rico this week, I’m digging into my Puerto Rico photos. The series ended last night with each team winning a game. In yesterday’s post, I mentioned that the final game would be “electric,” with Twins’ Puerto […]

Baseball and boas

Baseball and boas

Marty’s photo of the day #2517: In honor of the Minnesota Twins vs. Cleveland Indians baseball games in Puerto Rico this week, I’m digging into my Puerto Rico photos. The island really needs these games as a pick-me-up, after the Trump administration botched the hurricane recovery efforts (they have enough paper towels now, however). Both […]

The first major review of Time Is Irreverent

The first major review of Time Is Irreverent

The normal process for books is to submit them to major reviewers months before publication, so that their comments can appear on the release date. Because Time Is Irreverent satirically skewers today’s Republicans and predicts their future course, I couldn’t follow the normal process and risk that it become dated before its release. Not that […]

Time Is Irreverent is now available!

Time Is Irreverent is now available!

We’re early. Time Is Irreverent became available today! At this moment the only place to buy the book is on Amazon, but that will change in a few weeks. The trade paperback (with the silky-feel cover) is $14.95, and the Kindle version is specially priced at $2.99. The special Kindle price is very short-term—just long […]

Why I’m not watching tonight’s State of the Union Address

Why I’m not watching tonight’s State of the Union Address

I don’t think I’ve missed a State of the Union address in twenty years. But quite frankly, my time is more valuable than another Donald Trump performance. I know what’s going to happen anyway—and you probably do too: 1) Trump will pretend to be sane for the hour or so he speaks. 2) The media […]

Donald’s Switzerland date

Donald’s Switzerland date

Marty’s photo of the day #2435: Now that Melania Trump is giving Donald the cold shoulder over his porn star affair, Ryan Zinke is busy trying to find a date to accompany the toddler-in-chief on his upcoming Switzerland trip. So far, he’s only found one female mammal willing to get within ten feet of Donald […]

From the Liberal Ten Commandments, #6

From the Liberal Ten Commandments, #6

Imagine if the United States had an egomaniacal president who thought he was smart enough to drop nuclear bombs here and there without negative consequences. What if you could go back to AD 31 and present the people of Galilee with a new liberal version of the Ten Commandments? How would that affect our culture […]

The silver lining of the Trump presidency . . .

The silver lining of the Trump presidency . . .

The hypocrisy and disingenuousness of conservative Christians has never been more apparent than it is now with their support of everything Donald Trump. First, they voted overwhelmingly for Trump, who is the opposite of the Jesus depicted in the Bible, then they supported Trump when he attempted to take away health care, gave corporate polluters […]

Pure Evil!

Pure Evil!

My wife and I, along with 20,000 Montanans, have our insurance through the wonderful Montana Health Co-op. As a result of Donald Trump’s vindictive and sadistic executive order to undermine Obamacare, it appears as if the co-op will have to pull out of the exchange. If 20,000 people in Montana are losing their health insurance, […]

The Trump IQ Test Winner!

The Trump IQ Test Winner!

Marty’s photo of the day #2334: As you probably heard, Psycho Don challenged Secretary of State Rex Tillerson to an IQ test contest. What you probably haven’t heard is that a third contestant entered the contest and won. I’m proud to share with you an exclusive photo of that third contestant and winner! Congratulations Mr. […]

We can make it!

We can make it!

Marty’s photo of the day #2330: I will get back to politics in a bit, but after this last week, we all deserve a cuteness break. In my arms is a baby silver wallaroo—perhaps the most adorable animal in all of Australia. Now that you have this wallaroo in your mind, close your eyes, take […]

Hey Republicans! I know you still insist that Donald Trump isn’t a bigot. . . .

Hey Republicans! I know you still insist that Donald Trump isn’t a bigot. . . .

Hey Republicans! I know you still insist that Donald Trump isn’t a bigot, and that you are not a bigot for voting for him. I also know that anything I write won’t change your mind. Nevertheless, I have to try.   Here’s what Donald Trump tweeted at 5:19 a.m. this morning: “Such poor leadership ability […]

If a Donald Trump . . .

If a Donald Trump . . .

If a Donald Trump tweets in the night, and he doesn’t misspell any words, is he still an incompetent narcissistic psychopath?

Unfortunate last names

Unfortunate last names

While I wait for the editing and cover art to be completed for my new science-fiction political-satire, Time is Irreverent, I have plenty of work to do, running my talent agency. One of those jobs includes updating my list of more than 7,000 college talent buyers. It’s a tedious task, as I have to visit […]

Higher than a . . .

Higher than a . . .

Marty’s photo of the day #2291: They’re louder than a Trump self-compliment! Faster than a Trump staff change! Classier than a Trump hat hawked at a flood! Higher than a Russian hooker giving Trump his golden shower! Ladies and gentleman: The Scarlet Macaws! (Photographed in Costa Rica)

The silver lining to the Trump presidency

The silver lining to the Trump presidency

What is the silver lining to the Trump presidency? Religion—especially the Evangelical sect—has lost all credibility and moral authority in American politics. I have nothing against religion, as long as it’s not used as a sledgehammer to make laws and take away the freedoms of others. I also object to religious organizations getting tax deductions. […]

Trump didn’t go rogue!

Trump didn’t go rogue!

It is unacceptable for Trump’s staff, Republican politicians, or Trump voters to say “Trump went rogue” on Tuesday, when he equated Nazi white supremacists with people protesting white supremacists. Trump didn’t go rogue. He went modus operandi! No one who paid enough attention to the presidential campaign to vote should be surprised by even one […]

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