Upon hearing Melania Trump claim, “I’m the most bullied person on the world,” Martyman decided to get out the world’s smallest violin to play the world’s saddest song on her behalf. Either that or he just finished reading Stormy Daniels’ book and is trying to visualize Donald Trump’s Mushroom Mario Kart. I’m not sure which.
Posts tagged Melania Trump
Marty’s photo of the day #2665: Today’s photo doubles as a Paul Bunyan-sized Happy Birthday to my wife, Deb Essen. When I took this photo of her, a while back, we were just having fun. In today’s light, it’s actually political. Melania Trump is infamous for appearing in photos that are incongruous for the occasion: […]
Marty’s photo of the day #2435: Now that Melania Trump is giving Donald the cold shoulder over his porn star affair, Ryan Zinke is busy trying to find a date to accompany the toddler-in-chief on his upcoming Switzerland trip. So far, he’s only found one female mammal willing to get within ten feet of Donald […]
Marty’s photo of the day #2307: Martyman is all excited, because I gave him a $5,000.00 bill. “With all this money, I can impress the ladies,” he said. “Maybe I can even get a mail-order stripper-bride, just like Melania Trump! Did I say stripper? I mean ‘high-class model-bride.’” Poor Martyman is in for a letdown. […]
To vote for Donald Trump one must be either evil or naïve. That may seem extreme, but hear me out. Based on Trump’s campaign message, there are three basic reasons to vote for him: 1) Because you agree with his bigoted stand against Muslims, Mexicans, and other minorities, and you think building a border wall […]
Hi! Martyman here. I’m filling in on this blog for Marty Essen, who has taken the night off to be with his wife, Deb. As a patriotic person, Marty believes it’s every citizen’s duty to watch both the Republican and Democratic National Conventions. However, his definition of “patriotism” seems to be looser than most, as […]
After watching the Republican National Convention last night, I went to sleep disgusted by all of the hate, lies, and misinformation spewed forth. However, I felt kind of proud of myself that I was open minded enough to like much of Melania Trump’s speech. She was articulate and handled herself well in what was obviously […]