Nature photography, political rants, and Martyman laughs from the ten-time award-winning author of "Cool Creatures, Hot Planet" and "Endangered Edens."

The political beer test

Marty Essen

Every Wednesday my local newspaper, the Missoulian, and many other newspapers run a column by Rich Lowry of the National Review and Fox News. If you’ve ever read him, you already know that he has the honesty of a hooker’s orgasm and the integrity of a banker emailing you from Nigeria.

Today he started his column like this: “Hillary Clinton may be the first candidate in American history to win a contest of personalities without having one.”

In response, I would like to say that what Rich Lowry, Donald Trump, Rudy Giuliani, and so many other Republicans don’t understand is that being a loudmouthed lying asshole is not a trait of someone with a desirable personality. In fact, being a loudmouthed lying asshole is actually compensation for being so void inside that you actually don’t have a personality.

As for myself, I find Hillary Clinton’s personality to be fascinating and compelling. And in the “who would you rather have a beer with test,” there is no question who I would rather have a beer with . . . . Okay, actually it’s Rudy Giuliani, who I find to be the most repugnant person on Earth. I would love to have a beer with him—so I could pour it over his head after I told him exactly what I thought of him!

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